How It All Goes Down
The Lottery, 1791
- Trachim's wagon accident seems to be the most exciting thing that's happened here in years.
- No one even knows if the man died, but there's still tons of speculation: maybe he was swept out to sea, maybe he faked his own death, maybe he was rescued and is still alive, maybe he was Elvis. Who knows?
- The Well-Regarded Rabbi (WHO TALKS LIKE THIS) takes in the baby inside the Upright Synagogue. (Where the Upright Citizens worship, we guess.)
- Women aren't allowed in the synagogue, so they look at the baby through a hole in the wall.
- After a week, the Rabbi has no idea what to do with the baby, so he decides to give it to "any righteous man" who wants her.
- He gets fifty-two notes under his door.
- The Rabbi can't make a decision ("ALL A LITTLE BELOW AVERAGE" (2.26) he says, as though he's the Bachelorette trying to hand out roses), so he lets the baby choose.
- He dumps the slips with names into her crib, but she doesn't want to pick one either.
- Eventually he chooses one, and it's Yankel D.