How we cite our quotes: (Chapter.Paragraph)
Quote #4
My mother and father would not approve of my kicking someone when she's down. I don't care. (14.48-9)
Tris wants us to think that she doesn't care what her parents would think. But there's a big difference between kicking someone and thinking "I wonder what's for lunch today"—which shows you really don't care—and kicking someone and thinking "mom and dad wouldn't be thrilled with this." She may say she doesn't care, but the fact that she's still thinking about her parents shows that she kind of maybe sort of does.
Quote #5
My father used to say that sometimes, the best way to help someone is just to be near them. I feel good when I do something I know he would be proud of, like it makes up for all the things I've done that he wouldn't be proud of. (16.17)
Here's one way Tris finds to deal with past guilt. Yes, she abandoned her family, but she can still put into practice some of their lessons, like helping other people, or scrubbing the floor like her mom would (17.3). Does this make up for her past guilt, though? Or does she still feel guilty?
Quote #6
Somewhere inside me is a merciful, forgiving person. Somewhere there is a girl who tries to understand what people are going through, who accepts that people do evil things and that desperation leads them to darker places than they ever imagined. I swear she exists, and she hurts for the repentant boy I see in front of me. But if I saw her, I wouldn't recognize her. (23.92-3)
Here's a guilt and blame twofer: (1) how much does Tris blame Al for joining with Peter and attacking her?; and (2) how guilty does Tris feel for not forgiving Al? It's curious that this issue of guilt and blame is phrased in the same way that Tris talks about her identity—it's about being able to recognize a part of herself. If only she'd had mirrors growing up.