How we cite our quotes: (Chapter.Paragraph)
Quote #7
"Guilt. Yes. […] Well, I'm guilty. And lucky, too. I was there at the right time. I could have been at a meeting, we could have both been at meetings." (17.67)
This line recalls an earlier quote in which Calvin says he believes that "Being a father is more than trusting to luck" (2.15). Whenever he experiences bad luck, Calvin blames himself for it. He doesn't give himself credit for being there at the right time.
Quote #8
"For surviving, maybe. No, that's not it, for being too much like her. Hell, I don't know." (17.82)
To stop blaming himself, Conrad first has to figure out what it is that he blames himself for. Both of the points he makes here are valid. He has survivor's guilt for living when his brother died. And he definitely sees himself in his mother—but only in her less desirable qualities, like her selfishness and isolation.
Quote #9
Life is not a series of pathetic, meaningless actions. Some of them are so far from pathetic, so far from meaningless as to be beyond reason, maybe beyond forgiveness. (19.67)
Calvin stops blaming himself and starts blaming his wife as the book progresses. Because the book is told from his point of view, this is seen as progress. It isn't perfect, but for Calvin, it's a step in the right direction.