Why Should I Care About This Driver Record Baloney?
First of all, it’s spelled B-O-L-O-G-N-A. Second, if you have racked up too many negligent driver points, your license will either be suspended or revoked by the DSD. You can apply for a new license at the end of this period, and hopefully you’ve changed your ways by then. Oh, sure, it starts with a few minor traffic violations here and there, but before you know it you’ll be committing grand larceny, bank fraud, and/or treason. We just don’t want to start seeing your name in the paper. Unless it’s for inventing some useful electronic gadget, or winning a peace prize. That would be pretty cool.
Each time you have a mark on your record, it stays there for 36 months (or longer, if you did something really shady). Your license can be suspended for if you accumulate 12 points within a 12-month period or 18 points in a 24-month period. If you can put up 30 points in 42 minutes, you’ll probably make tonight’s highlight reel on ESPN.
Here are a few examples of what can get you points on your driving record:
2-pointers
- Driving three to nine mph over the speed limit
3-pointers
- Violation of oversize or overweight permits pertaining to restriction on hours of operation
- Any shot made from beyond the 3-point arc
4-pointers
- Careless driving
- Following too closely
- Failure to yield or stop
- Illegal passing in a Traffic Safety Corridor
- Driving ten to 19 mph over the speed limit
6-pointers
- Negligent driving
- Failure to yield to an authorized emergency vehicle
- Failure to stop for a school bus while the bus is loading or unloading
- Failure to obey official traffic control devices in school zone, playground, crosswalk, or park
- Driving without insurance
- Operating a vehicle after consuming alcohol as a minor
- Speeding in a school zone or playground crosswalk
- Driving 20mph or more over the speed limit
9-pointers
- Leaving the scene of a crash
10-pointers
- Driving with a suspended or revoked license
- Driving while intoxicated
- Reckless driving
- Refusing to take a breath test
- Fleeing from or attempting to elude a police officer
- Racing
- Vehicular homicide or assault
- Nailing any shot from the 10-point bubble during a mid-90s MTV Rock ‘N’ Jock basketball game
Like a Vandal in the Wind
If you absolutely must destroy something, either break a pencil or beat up on your pillow. It’s far too costly to be caught doing anything worse, such as spray-painting graffiti onto the side of a bridge or keying your ex-boyfriend’s Mustang. If already licensed, you can lose your license for a couple years; if you’re not there yet, you can have the issuance of your license delayed for several years. And you’re going to need your license, because it sounds like you’ll have to be doing a lot of running from the authorities.